Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
i think im in europe. pls send help
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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