Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
