That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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