I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
i think im in europe. pls send help
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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