Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize
