I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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