Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Randomize
