Will you blow on my dice?
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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