And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
