apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
