Someone shit on the floor
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
You've changed since you got that strap on
as a side note pls kill me
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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