Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Randomize
