Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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