And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
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