just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
