she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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