i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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