This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
