what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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