you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Randomize
