first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
jump out the window naked night went bad
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