We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
