Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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