what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Randomize
