So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
