Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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