he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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