That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
