i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Randomize
