I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
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