i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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