You really coming over, don't trick.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
