Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
