he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
My feet surprised me
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
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