A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
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