i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
