there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
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