so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Randomize
