Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize