seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Randomize
