I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
