don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
