Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
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