3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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