whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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