My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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