When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
