we have officially lost it.
farters have to be the big spoon...
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Randomize
