dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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