Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
